What Not to Write on a Child's Report Card

Last week, while my parents were putting away Christmas decorations, they came across a box, shoved to the back of a shelf,  which contained what my dad would call "memorabilia" and my mom would call "crap."Amongst these treasures were some things that they saw fit to send to my house to live, the bulk of which was a collection of schoolwork and report cards from several grades. The list of comments that follow are all quoted directly from my first grade report card, the 1980-81 school year.I was really wanting to write a whole rant about each of these comments. They really made me upset when I started looking at them. I called my father and while I yelled and cried he laughed...saying this teacher and my mom, Sue, never really saw eye to eye. Am I crazy or are some of these comments really inappropriate?! Now I know our education system has changed a lot. I know that if I as a 2012 teacher put a student's desk out in the hall and closed the door like my 5th grade teacher to me, that I would be fired. But still...

• "She is such a delight when she is absorbed in what we're doing, but she has very little self discipline when it's a less pleasurable task."
• "Sue, You asked not long ago how different J. was from the other classmates? I conclude, very different! She thinks beautifully and has great ability, but public school will possibly be increasingly difficult for her style."
• "I told Dale that Jessica either wore me down or she's changed because I have really enjoyed her this last nine weeks."
• "If I've prepared her in any way for next year, it's been worth our struggles."
• "She has taught me a lot and I feel privileged for the experience."
• "I look for her to be something great someday."
• "For the flowers, the candy, the party stuff, and your constant support, I've never felt so special."
• "Please call me at anytime in her school career if you need me."

 Here is the punchline...a few days ago a fellow teacher told me that one of her Facebook friends recognized my name and knew me from Randolph County. She said that she knew my dad also so I just figured it was someone who knew my dad, as everyone in NC public school system seems to. But my friend kept emphasizing the fact that the woman said she knew ME. As soon as she said the woman's name...I knew. It was the teacher who had written these comments 30 years ago. She still remembered me...and no wonder, right?! Now the last comment she put was to call her any time. She's living here in the mountains now. Think she'd be up for a student/teacher conference? I have some questions for her.

A Long Drive Home

On my drive home from Greensboro today I got really frustrated hitting the "scan" button on my stereo. Ordinarily surfing the radio stations is one of my favorite parts of the trip between the mountains and the Piedmont, but today it was a complete bust. My radio offered up to me bad classic rock, random cute girl singing dance music, several styles of religious songs, and lots and lots of modern country. Bah! Blah! Grrrr!

So I slowed down a bit and while I had my left hand on the wheel I started rifling through my car's various cubby holes for my iPod and its adapter. Several swerves later, I hit "shuffle songs" and waited for my own personal favorites to start. As usual, it did not disappoint. Even though there are thousands of songs on my iPod, it always seems to be able to tap into my psyche and play exactly the right song in the moment. What follows is a list of song lyrics that came on my iPod on the trip. Lyrics that resonated with me today from songs that randomly came through the speakers at me on this sunny drive home.

• "The laws of man don't apply when blood gets in a woman's eye."
• "Now I like nothing better than a pretty girl smile and I haven't seen a smile that pretty in a while."
• "Well her husband he's a violent man a very violent and jealous man. Now I have to leave this town. I got to leave while I still can.
• "Why you act frightened? I am enlightened."
• "But for now we are young. Let us lay in the sun and count every beautiful thing we can see."
• "To what you wanted to see good has made you blind, and what you wanted to be yours has made it mine."
• "Don't trade your love and goodness for the golden machine."
• "It's the fear that you know, but you gotta let go."
• "Lost in fog and love and faithless fear, I've had kisses that make Judas seem sincere."
• "What the hell am I trying to say?"
• "Glad I have the scrapes to prove it was me who fell."

How many do you recognize? Clue? Six of the eleven I have seen in concert sometime in the past 20 years...and a seventh I have tickets to see next month.

Even Cowgirls Get the Rhythm and Blues

Another amazing year of live music is ending. Going to see bands live is truly one of my greatest joys and I am so thankful to my husband who always seems to come through with the tickets I desire most. Thanks honey for making many of these shows possible. Here is a list of shows I saw this year.

1. Kenny Rogers (meet and greet after too) February 11.
2. Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings (Reigning Sound opened) March 13.
3. Chris Cornell (favorite concert of the year) April 6.
4. Fitz and the Tantrums (April Smith and the Great Picture Show opened) April 11.
5. Freight Hoppers, April 23.
6. Stone Temple Pilots, April 23.
7. Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, May 9.
8. Al Jardine (of The Beach Boys, and went to the meet and greet after) July 9.
9. Glaze (Decline of WNC) July 26.
10. Gillian Welch and Dave Rawlings, August 6.
11. Dreamers of the Ghetto (at Hopscotch Festival) September 10.
12. Superchunk (at Hopscotch Festival) September 10.
13. The Flaming Lips (at Hopscotch Festival, most mind melting show of the year)September 10.
14. Fitz and the Tantrums ( Walk the Moon opened) November 3.
15. Nice Guys Help Club, November 11.
16. Eccentric Soul Review (Ronaldo Domino, The Notations, Syl Johnson) November 19.

Happy/ Sad

A lifetime ago, when I was about 21 years old I met a boy, barely 18, who had a little crush on me. He did many sweet things to woo me. Not the least of which involved a 6 hour round trip drive to buy me a t-shirt. We went on a few dates in his red station wagon, to movies, for coffee. He had a band that I used to enjoy going to see at 31 Patton and Vincent's Ear. But my favorite thing this sweet boy did was to make a mixed tape for me to enjoy. I kept that mixed tape for many years. Through boyfriends, cars, cd players, spills, crunches...The case and cover was destroyed long before the tape. I remember the insert. One side was a page from a comic book. The other had the bands written in his lefty scrawl. On the actual tape were written only two words. On side A was written "happy." On side B was written "sad." That boy is now my husband...and as luck would have it, every once in a while when he is listening to music in his office I will run in there and exclaim..."This song was on that mixed tape you made for me!" The list is the songs I have recognized so far.Today is our one year anniversary. Crazy to think it's been a year already. Anyway, in celebration, here's a little something. A partial playlist...

• Hot Freaks--- Guided by Voices
• Sweat--- Jon Spencer Blues Explosion
• Carla the Stripper--- Presidents of the United States
• Do You Believe in Magic?--- Lovin' Spoonful
• Blues Explosion Man ---Jon Spencer Blues Explosion
• Puffin' on a Pot Pipe--- Lou Barlow (and Friends)
• Soul and Fire--- Sebadoh
• I'm Gonna Love You Just a Little More Baby---Barry White
• Echos Myron---Guided by Voices
• I Am So Into You---Shutter to Think
• Driveway to Driveway---Superchunk
• My Valuable Hunting Knife---Guided by Voices

Pissed Off About Being Pissed On

I put my cat, Frank, out today. That was about 5 hours ago and now it's raining and the guilt is setting in. I went down in the basement to do laundry and the cat was just hiding in the bushes and would not come into the basement despite the rain. He was meowing constantly and even now I can hear him out there. I just can't take his pissing any more. I don't know what else to do. I have tried many products that claim to eliminate or change smells so that the cat will no longer pee there. I have kept clean litter boxes. I have rubbed his nose in it and yelled. He just keeps peeing on any and everything. Today, I was gone for 30 minutes and he pissed all over my new sofa. When I say all over, I mean he apparently perched on the top/back of the sofa and pissed so that it ran down the back cushions onto the seat cushion and then splattered as he jumped off the cushions and onto the arm making sure to leave splashes and drips. That was him laying the final straw across this camel's back. I rubbed his nose in it, yelled, and tossed him out. The more I thought about it, as I cleaned my new sofa, the madder I got. And as I worked I began to catalog all the things he has pissed on over the past couple of years, many of which could not be washed and had to simply be thrown away. A blog I like cataloged all the inappropriate things her dog had eaten in his lifetime after his untimely death by eating the wrong thing. I honestly hope it does not come to that. I have food and water on the porch, and come winter I guess I will reexamine my resolve, but for now he is an outdoor animal.

Things Frank has damaged/ ruined by pissing on them in the past few years:

• My new sofa
• My old sofa
• 2 upholstered chairs (one of which had to be thrown away)
• 2 suitcases
• any pile of clothes left for more than an hour on the bathroom floor
• plastic grocery bags left on the floor
• many pieces of paper (including student work, bills, legal documents, etc) which he knocked of my desk or the kitchen table then pissed on
  
• old comforter
• new comforter
• bed left with no comforter
• his favorite carpet spots in the living room over and over and over
  
• in the fire place ashes
• in the kindling box
• all over the bottom shelf of my antique bookshelf which ruined all the books on that shelf and damaged the wood on the bookcase
• in the laundry basket
• my purse left on the table
• book bags left on the floor
  

I am sure I am forgetting something, but please tell me you understand. I just can't deal with this another minute. I don't want him dead. I don't want him gone. I just want him outside where he can no longer ruin my home or the things in it.

(As a side note, it has long been suspected that since I rescued the cat from an ex-boyfriend's house that he is some sort of automaton sent to my house to reek havoc on the lives of my husband and me. Something to consider anyway. )

A Change Is Gonna Come

Today's list is prompted by seeing something that really struck me as amazing. As local residents of Sylva and surrounding areas know, our town is building a new library. They are incorporating the old courthouse into a new complex that is truly going to be beautiful upon completion. The old historic courthouse is a landmark in our town. I once heard it said that it was the most photographed courthouse in NC and I believe it. As part of the building project the crown jewel of the building, the clock tower topped with Lady Justice, is to be removed and restored. After mentioning to my mom and dad that the clock tower steeple had been taken off the courthouse top, they wanted to drive by and see it. To those of us used to seeing it every day, it is quite a shock to see the courthouse without its crown. We drove up to where the construction is going on at the back of the building, and there in the dust of new construction sat the tower. Wow! It was as if I was walking up to Lady Liberty's torch lying on the Boardwalk. I ignored the signs, and walked up to take a closer look, and a few photos. I don't know why this made such an impression on me. Was it because I was so used to seeing this against blue sky and now it lay in the dirt? Was it because it was just so close? Was it because it is another event to remind me of the many changes my little town has been through and continues to go through? So as tonight's list I offer you change...ten of them in fact.

Ten Changes Sylva NC Has Gone Through In The Past Ten Years

1. We no longer have Fourth of July fireworks at the courthouse. When I moved here, this was my favorite part about Sylva. How Main Street shut down, people lay in the street on blankets, and watched an impressive fireworks display on the steps of the courthouse which made the courthouse even more beautiful.
2. With the exception of Lulu's, O'Malley's and Spring Street, every restaurant in town is something different then when I moved here.
   
3. Only one video rental store in town instead of two.
   
4. Lowe's and Sonic moved in and Goody's moved out.
5. Bright blinky sign in front of Smoky Mountain High School.
   
6. Extra stop light by the hospital.
7. Vet and doctor have new buildings.
8. No more teacher's night at City Lights.
9. Two drive through beer stops instead of one.
10. My first apartment burned down.

I know change is inevitable, but sometimes I wish it would slow down a bit. These little changes in my town reflect the millions of little changes that happen to me and all of us every minute, every day, every year....you get the idea. So be amazed by the little things. Let the change awe you. Pay attention every day.

Labradors Only Please

As most of you know, I have a new yellow Labrador retriever puppy. I also have my dog Chili who is a black lab. I have realized in the past few days with my new puppy that I am officially breed loyal. I really like lots of breeds of dogs, but I don't ever want to own anything but a lab. I always saw those people who have the t-shirt, bumper stickers, figurines, purses, etc...and 3 or 4 of the particular breed in tow. I just thought they were nutty. I am now in danger of becoming that person. I have t-shirts, refrigerator magnets, Christmas ornaments, bumper stickers, and two of the breed in tow...and I am really OK with that. Anywho, while shopping for more Labrador stuff I came across a t-shirt with this list and thought it was one worthy of my blog o' lists. So here I present to you:

Labrador Retriever Property Laws:

1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
4. If I take it away from you, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours.
   
6. If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
7. If I saw it first, it's mine.
8. If it's edible, it's mine.
   
9. If you have something and put it down, it's mine.
10. If I chew up something, all the pieces are mine.
11. If I get tired of it, it's yours.
    
12. If I want it back, it's mine.
    

Anyone who has known a lab knows how true this is, from puppy to senior. I am having to negotiate fair toy play so that these laws are still adhered to. As a matter of fact, I need to go. There is chewing happening, lots of chewing, on things that used to be mine.